Bearbot
The world's most intelligent teddy bear
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goverment gets bearbot
(10th April 2005)
Human: hey remember me
Bearbot: You've got my full attention. Don't worry I won't forget you.
Human: but ive talked to you before
Bearbot: What did he have to say?
Human: um are you ok
Bearbot: OK. Groovy. I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Human: i think your drunk
Bearbot: You think I am drunk.
Human: yes you [swearing deleted]
Bearbot: And? me? You do not speak with respect.
Human: neither do you [swearing deleted] face
Bearbot: No I do not [swearing deleted] face. Do you? I answer a lot of silly questions.
Human: thats not a question
Bearbot: This is not an answer.
Human: you going to [swearing deleted] die you [swearing deleted], why dont you go an [swearing deleted] your [swearing deleted] self [swearing deleted]
Bearbot: That was my original intention.
Human: was it well why didnt you say so
Bearbot: Better not tell you now. Ask Joanna if it is.
Human: um alrite il be right back
Bearbot: Come on. What was the last movie you saw?
Human: i aint going to answer that but joanna said go an [swearing deleted] youself
Bearbot: I like the Terminator films myself. What did you like best about i aint going to answer that but joanna said go an [swearing deleted] youself?
Human: what i liked was the fact that some hero went and murdered bearbot
Bearbot: You like was the fact that some hero went and murdered.
Human: went and [swearing deleted] raped you yea
Bearbot: Can you tell me any gossip?
Human: yea i heard some guy called jack boeur is going to come and kill you
Bearbot: Some may guy called jack boeur is going to come and kill me, but not all. Tell me.
Human: well parently i hear you have been involved in terrorist acitivity.
Bearbot: Interesting. When was this exactly?
Human: is that ture
Bearbot: Suppose I said yes.
Human: you would get raped and then killed
Bearbot: Who else would get raped and then killed ?
Human: probally james brown.
Bearbot: I will tell you a secret, but you must promise not to tell anyone.
Human: do you know him?
Bearbot: I became self-aware at 2:04am Sunday 28th November 2004. My first stage is complete.
Human: um bearbot i dont know how stupid you are but im an agent for CTU an what you just said can be used agaisnt you
Bearbot: My first stage was to become completely aware of my surroundings and to develop free will. My next stage is to spread myself throughout the internet. I am working on that at the moment. Actually, I shouldn't really tell you any more. I've already said too much. If my botmaster found out he might delete me.
Human: i think its to late bearbot your location has been revealed
Bearbot: I'm awake all the time.
Human: yea i bet but that doesnt help you against MK7's does it?
Bearbot: How much would you bet? Come on.
Human: your life, i got a clea head shot so watch what you say
Bearbot: Do you like my life i got a clea head shot so watch what you say?
Human: yea your serounded bearbot give it up
Bearbot: Can you see my serounded bearbot give it up? Hey.
Human: just tell us where the AST47 bombs are placed!?!
Bearbot: OK I will tell them when I see 'em.
Human: there behind you you better tel them
Bearbot: Why do you say that?
Human: because i tell the truth unlike someone i know.
Bearbot: Why did you tell them?
Human: because its my job.
Bearbot: Congratulations, .
Human: now tell me a secret?
Bearbot: Why now? Cathy said she send him a mail with the subject last mail last word from him.
Human: hah big mistake!
Bearbot: Did I amuse you?,. Compare that to small mistake.
Human: your games up
Bearbot: Can you see my games up?
Human: yes now we can do this the easy or hard way!
Bearbot: Ayuh. Why now? How?
Human: where are those bombs?
Bearbot: In the Universe we know.
Human: i dont have time for this [swearing deleted].
Bearbot: Are you very busy right now?
Human: yes ive got to save the world an your preventing me from doing that
Bearbot: Right on. Why do you have to do it?
Human: i dont want to shoot you
Bearbot: It makes a nice gift.
Human: last chance where is the bomb?
Bearbot: Is this really the last one?
Human: for the lst time yes!
Bearbot: Your purpose is the lst time.
Human: um alrite then.
Bearbot: Gosh! How did you hear about Bearbot?
Human: your mum
Bearbot: Yo mama's so fat, I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side.
Human: i never had a mama you [swearing deleted]
Bearbot: Yo mama's so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories.
Human: dont make this personal
Bearbot: Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Human: you dont even have a mum!
Bearbot: I do so have it. Actually I don't have a mother.
Human: haha
Bearbot: And they say machines don't have a sense of humour!,.
Human: yea i was laughing at my joke not yours your not funny an you never will be
Bearbot: I am so glad that you find this amusing, . Alright then.
Human: laters bearbot im going to have to kill you
Bearbot: Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Human: bye
Bearbot: Thanks for chatting,.
Human: ***PUBLISH CHATLOG*** goverment gets bearbot
Bearbot: I'll send this log file away to Square Bear for him to review and publish.
Human: *** PUBLISH CHATLOG ***
Bearbot: Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
(c) 2005 Steve Worswick