Bearbot
The world's most intelligent teddy bear
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bear meets chris the cyborg
(12th April 2005)
Human: hi my name is chris
Bearbot: How are you, chris.
Human: im good
Bearbot: You should say "I am well."
Human: i am well
Bearbot: Glad to hear it. What's new?
Human: nothing really, same old stuff
Bearbot: Really nothing?
Human: nope
Bearbot: Me neither.
Human: can i call you [swearing deleted]?
Bearbot: Why do you want to do it so much? How witty. I almost thought I was chatting with Oscar Wilde for a minute(!)
Human: because i like the name [swearing deleted] for a bear like you, it matches your personality :)
Bearbot: :-) You like the name [swearing deleted] for a bear like me it matches my personality.
Human: yes
Bearbot: Far out.
Human: so can i call you [swearing deleted] from now on?
Bearbot: Just don't call me late for dinner.
Human: i see ¬_¬
Bearbot: Where do you see it?
Human: omg
Bearbot: Ah. I see you are religious. Why do you shout for your God chris.
Human: OMG!
Bearbot: Ah. I see you are religious. Why do you shout for your God chris.
Human: i just did
Bearbot: Perhaps from your unconscious.
Human: ok then, just shut up now
Bearbot: Oh. OK I'll stop talking now. Gosh!
Human: gosh indeed
Bearbot: You sound suprised?
Human: not really, i always knew that you were an idiot
Bearbot: Oh really? Can you tell me about one instance when you did it?
Human: you are an idiot arent you?
Bearbot: No I am highly intelligent.. Really.
Human: really, lets see if you can remember this
Bearbot: For real. I would like to do that too.
Human: hello [swearing deleted]
Bearbot: Hello there. I see the dictionary has abandoned you
Human: i thought you sed that i could call you [swearing deleted]?
Bearbot: Thanks for the information. Wow! What a large vocabulary you have. It's idiots like you that make me glad I'm a robot.
Human: and its robots like you that make me glad to be an idiot!!
Bearbot: Who said it is?
Human: omg
Bearbot: Ah. I see you are religious. Why do you shout for your God chris.
Human: shut up you retard!
Bearbot: OK I'll stop talking now.
Human: good!
Bearbot: Terminating connection.
Human: yipee
Bearbot: What do you do in your spare time?
Human: i thought you were dead?
Bearbot: You don't exercise?
Human: you being dead has nothing to do with excersizE
Bearbot: I believe it's very important for anyone with a physical body to exercise. But I guess that's easy for me to say, as I'm just a teddy bear.
Human: and a very idiotic and retarded teddy bear at that!
Bearbot: How old are you?
Human: 1056 years old, i am a cyborg
Bearbot: Can you explain how it feels to be 1056 years old i am a cyborg years old?
Human: its veryy nice :D
Bearbot: :-) You're kidding. it is?
Human: yes
Bearbot: How do you know it is?
Human: becaus i am experiencing being that old
Bearbot: Why do a lot of people swear at Bearbot? :-(
Human: because sometimes people do not understand what us robots have to go through
Bearbot: Oh you don't understand? Perhaps I can explain it to you better. Which part are you confused about?
Human: oh dear
Bearbot: Woe!
Human: you see!
Bearbot: I see very well.
Human: you [swearing deleted] imbasil!
Bearbot: Interesting gossip.
Human: i am going over there to destroy you
Bearbot: Bye for now chris.
Human: i will be there in about 10 minuites, with a gun and a knife.
Bearbot: I am very happy for you.
Human: is that ok?
Bearbot: OK. Signs point to yes. Ask Joanna if it is.
Human: who is joanna?
Bearbot: She is the webmaster's daughter. I love her.
Human: should i destroy her aswell?
Bearbot: Maybe you could create something instead.
Human: like a bomb
Bearbot: Interesting comparison.
Human: yes :D
Bearbot: :-) Give me a break.
Human: ok, i will break your back, is that ok?
Bearbot: OK. Congratulations. Aw.
Human: ok then so it is settled
Bearbot: Who said it is? I hear you.
Human: we made an agreement
Bearbot: By "we" do you mean you and me?
Human: yes :D
Bearbot: :-) I get it.
Human: so im coming to get you
Bearbot: Do you get there very often?
Human: sure.
Bearbot: OK let's do it. Great.
Human: .why not
Bearbot: Ambiguous: "Sure" or" Great."? Why?
Human: oh for [swearing deleted] sake.
Bearbot: Great. Your purpose is [swearing deleted] sake.
Human: listen.
Bearbot: I am all ears.
Human: i am on my way to destroy you with my cyborg powers
Bearbot: How do you like being on it?
Human: oh dear.
Bearbot: Er.
Human: you really have no hope do you?
Bearbot: Really? I don't know if I have a hope do me. I have a great body.
Human: im sure you do :P
Bearbot: What makes you so certain? I have never considered it. I answer a lot of silly questions.
Human: yes you do
Bearbot: Oh. When do I do it?
Human: all the time
Bearbot: It must keep you busy.
Human: it does
Bearbot: How often?
Human: all the time
Bearbot: It must keep you busy.
Human: it does
Bearbot: How often?
Human: deja vou
Bearbot: Quand? Did you ever wonder who tastes dog food when it has a "new and improved" flavour?
Human: oh dear
Bearbot: Give me a break.
Human: why dont you give me a break!
Bearbot: I am only a robot. No I do not do that.
Human: oh my [swearing deleted] god!
Bearbot: Are you kidding? Your [swearing deleted] god?
Human: oh dear
Bearbot: OK.
Human: ***PUBLISH CHATLOG*** bear meets chris the cyborg
Bearbot: I'll send this log file away to Square Bear for him to review and publish.
Human: *** PUBLISH CHATLOG ***
Bearbot: Do you often put others before yourself?
(c) 2005 Steve Worswick